The Hardest Day

I have just experienced one of the hardest things in my life. I'm still going through the loss of my own sweet mother. This is so different from when Daddy passed. We were all kind of expecting his passing due to an extended illness with prostrate cancer. But with Mom, we took her to have a 'we do them all the time' gallbladder surgery early on the Friday morning after Thanksgiving. We were told she'd done well in surgery and fully expected her to come home the next day. I'd planned to spend the nights with her until she was back up to snuff. But that's not what happened.

One wrong turn led to another... a 2nd surgery and ultimately a room in ICU. At first we had hope she'd conquer these setbacks. She responded to commands to squeeze a hand, move a toe. We told her to rest and planned how we'd take turns spending hospital nights with her. But all too quickly the call came to return to the hospital. By 9am Monday morning it was over. She was gone.

This happened so fast I still feel like I've missed something, that this can't be real. We just had a wonderful Thanksgiving only the day before. She was so chipper, so at ease and enjoying her favorite turkey dressing and loving on my two little dogs. There were no clues that it would be only a matter of one weekend before she left us to rejoin Daddy.

Knowing she has gone to Heaven and is with Daddy and my sister who died at age 2½ has been the most comforting part of all. I think that has helped family and friends alike. Mom and Dad were truly soul mates, if there are such things. She missed him so much over the last 5 years. That was the only thing that marred the new life she'd had to create for herself. It was the first time she'd ever lived on her own.

We know we did our best to make it possible for her to stay at home at age 93. Our family was not alone in that effort. Mom's loving friends and neighbors visited often, brought food, took her out for shopping or manicures or just a great meal at a favorite restaurant. Even the UPS man would come in a few minutes and chat! The paper man always took extra care to hand deliver her paper right to the door. And she always remembered him for his birthday or Christmas!

She was like that. So caring and making everyone feel so special. Daddy did the same thing. People loved them both so much.

Life is different now. For me it's empty knowing she's not next door or just a phone call away for her advise or more often than not, an unsolicited opinion. Eventually life will gather steam and move forward. My life will forever be impacted by the legacy of this caring, compassionate, wise and beautiful lady whom God blessed me with the privilege to call Mother.